Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
cat food counts as protein by the way
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Randomize
