Ambien. No doubt about it.
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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