she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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