I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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