I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Randomize