I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Found your dick twin last night
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
