we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
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