it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Randomize
