You're completely useless in the revolution.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Randomize