My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Farmville is her only friend.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Randomize
