i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
