it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
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