Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Randomize
