i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
