How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
