What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
