Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
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