Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Randomize