Me too!
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Boobs speak an international language.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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