If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
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