Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
