I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Can you repeat that, but with context?
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize
