Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
