it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Randomize
