I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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