this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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