I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize