I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
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