if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Randomize
