a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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