my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
i believe in u and ur pee
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
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