you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
