A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize