my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
