spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize