did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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