Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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