I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
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