Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Randomize
