I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
