I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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