Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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