ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
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