Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Randomize
