The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Randomize