you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
