It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Randomize
