How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
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