She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
