Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Randomize
