He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Randomize
