3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
